It’s absolutely normal for a girl to have male friends. However, it is also not unusual for one of these male friends to develop a certain attraction for the female friend. However, your male friends are not immune to any women pheromones you might be emitting. Even if you do not wear any pheromone perfume, your body naturally emits pheromones. Hence, some of your boy friends might actually be interested in becoming your boyfriend. In fact, here are some of the signs that you might want to look out for to check if your boy friend likes you as a boyfriend already.
- Boy friend gets closer than usual. Males usually keep their distance from others, even from male friends, but more so from female ones. Perhaps this is because males are usually less attached and more solitary in nature than females. So if a boy friend suddenly starts hovering around you more closely (and more regularly) than before, then there might be something going on. This may not only be in the form of actual physical proximity. He can also start calling you more frequently, showing up in a lot of places you usually go to, and volunteering to accompany you everywhere.
- Boy friend wants to be bodyguard. It is natural for males to be protective about friends. However, most of the time, this protective nature does not go beyond a certain measure of inconvenience. In other words, they will worry about you but only until it is still convenient for them. If, a boy friend starts going an extra mile or more to make sure you are safe and sound, then something must be up with him. If he is willing to wait up for you for hours, accompany you home (when he lives in the other side of the world), or pick you up after school or work, then it is most likely that he is trying to be more than just friends with you, unless of course he is just practicing to become a professional bodyguard someday.
- Boy friend starts marking territories. Male friends can be overly protective especially when it comes to close friends. But, if a boy friend becomes unusually more concerned and overprotective about you going out with other males, then you can assume that there is something more there. Even though guys are not too kin on being chums with other males (especially those they don’t know), they usually don’t express any opinion on the matter. However, if you boy friend starts making a fuss about it, it is more often than not a display of territorial marking – a telltale sign of someone who’s clearly more than a friend.
How would you know if your boyfriend is the one? Incredible romantics would say “you would just know”. However, it is not as simple as that. You need a more solid proof or further indication to back that up else you could end up either becoming a playgirl switching lovers the way you switch clothes daily or worse, being an old maid, hopelessly waiting for that one non-existent guy to sweep you off your feet. Here are six (6) signs to guide you in telling if he’s the one.
- There’s friendship. What constitute friendship? Respect, honesty, faith, loyalty, and support. You have your own differences yet have mutual respect. You give and receive tough love and understand that honesty is a must. You trust and believe in one another. You are both loyal even in the middle of disagreements and challenges. You are there to stand by, defend, protect and support the other when needed. Just like a best friend, your family, loved ones and circle of friends agree that he brings out the best in you and vice versa.
- There’s mutual attraction. That sizzling chemistry is ever present. You feel pheromones at work every time you’re together. You find your scents irresistible – you with his aftershave, him with your pheromone cologne, even natural sweat. The movements, the manner of talking pull you closer to one another. There’s a thirst to know anything and everything – good, bad, ugly.
- Love never ceases and maturity grows. It gets stronger as each day passes by. Everyday, you find different reasons to love and fall in love. Regardless if you had a big fight a few minutes ago and had a shouting match, you are both matured and secured as individuals to welcome it as an added spice in the relationship and consider it normal as breathing itself.
- Words are not necessary. One quick look at his face and you know what’s he’s undergoing. It’s similar for him when he sees you. It’s like being part of each other that you fully understand what it’s like without uttering a word. You’re comfortable with your spaces. You can sit in silence for an hour without talking nor touching and still think that it’s the most special moment you shared. This signifies how at ease you are with the company of the other that spending a lifetime is not scary at all but instead, something to look forward to.
- Flaws and fine points are not separate and seen as one. You accept him for what he is and he does too to you. You are yourself. You don’t need to wear make up and take super pains to appear pretty just so to impress him. He doesn’t have to be really cool and sexy to capture and maintain your interest. You’re still perfect in his eyes as he is to you. You’ve seen the worst of each other and you don’t mind a bit.
- You have the same goals and dreams. You want the same things in life. It all goes down on how you see the future. You agree and compromise on things that really matter – living in the suburbs, having kids, enriching family values and the like.
Every relationship goes through issues and problems. The goal is not a relationship that has no issues or problems but to have a relationship that can face these issues and problems well. Since a relationship involves two people, making the relationship work depends on both people involved in the relationship. It is never just the problem of one person. At the start of a relationship, the pheromone advantage may prevent issues and problems from coming up but as time goes by, human pheromones will not be able to solve your problems for you.
Many couples, especially after trying to solve their issues and problems on their own, decide to have couples counseling to help them deal better. However, some couples or maybe the other person in the relationship, are not automatically receptive to having couples counseling. Below are just a few of the reasons why it is good to try.
- Have a neutral, third party to play referee and be a mediator. Discussing issues or problems that keep on coming up in the relationship is difficult. If something keeps on becoming a problem, then you have probably reached a point where you will discuss it in the same way, manner, and perspective. Having someone to help direct your discussion is a good way to see the issue in a different perspective.
- Improve communication. People who offer couples counseling may not know everything there is to know when it comes to relationships but they can offer various ways you can communicate better with your partner. In almost any issue or problem, communication plays a key role in resolving it. Couples counseling is not designed to solve your issues and problems for you, but it can arm you with communication tools and skills so that the two of you can address your issues and problems better.
- Work in progress. A relationship takes a lot of hard work and going to couples counseling is just one way of working on it. For busy couples, having regular couples counseling is one way to ensure that they are facing the issues and problems that they have in their relationship instead of getting lost amidst their busy lives. Unfortunately, even minor issues and problems result in a serious strain in a relationship. Having counseling is a good way to continue working on these minor issues and problems that are often put aside because of other more important and pressing things.
Thanks to the movies like The Graduate and the TV series Cougar Town, a younger guy dating an older woman is not such an unusual situation nowadays. Being called a cougar is not a bad thing anymore in this day and age and with popular cougars like Demi Moore, many young men find them very attractive.
The appeal of older women cannot be attributed to human pheromones alone. Although some may say that a younger guy-older woman relationship may answer the question on how do pheromones work, it cannot be denied that some older women have a certain appeal to younger men. They seem wiser, more sensual, and more self-assured than younger women so some guys prefer to date someone older.
Naturally, dating an older woman will have its own unique set of challenges. Below are some tips for guys who prefer to date an older woman.
- Be confident. If you are the type of guy who cannot decide for himself, shy, and clingy, then dating an older woman is not for you. Older women will not be bothered with men who would like to be mothered; they prefer someone who is assertive, confident, and self-assured.
- Treat her as an equal. Do not make your age difference an issue for your relationship. Instead, treat her as an equal in everything. Never refer to her as a cougar and best not to point out that she is much older than you.
- Respect her. Every girl, no matter the age, deserves respect. But older women will not tolerate any disrespect. These women have experienced a lot and gone through a lot in their lives, probably more than your share of stuff, and respect is something they will expect from their guy.
- Know what you want in life. An older woman is probably aware of what she wants in her life and she will be turned off with a guy who does not know what he wants in life. It is important that you have figured out your goals for your future and you have focus. Older women do not like uncertainty and this applies to men that have many issues in their lives.
- Don’t try to change her. It is the doom of your relationship if you so much as think about changing her. Older women are set in their ways and will not appreciate being changed by a younger man.
There are many things that are going on in a woman’s body. Every month women have their menstrual cycle which is their bodies’ way of getting ready for conception. During menstruation, their bodies are simply getting rid of eggs and uterine lining that their body prepared for conception.
There are many other information associated with menstruation and among these is menstrual synchrony. Menstrual synchrony is a theory that the menstrual cycles of women who live together synchronize over time. Since this concept is theory, this means that it is not yet an accepted fact although many studies suggest that this theory is indeed true.
The idea or concept of menstrual synchrony has been observed by a lot of women even before it was given a name. However, it was not until 1971 when an undergraduate named Martha McClintock formally made the first study on menstrual synchrony. Another study was done in 1998 by McClintock and Kathleen Stern to further explore the possibility that the release and reception of women pheromones are the reason why menstrual synchrony happens. Although this study suggests that pheromones for women which, in the study, was collected from the underarms of the women in the study, really have an effect on other women, the results were still not wholly conclusive especially since other studies are done to refute menstrual synchrony.
There were two other known studies that were done on menstrual synchrony. A study of 20 lesbian couples conducted by Weller and Weller showed that in more than half of these couples, the two women had their menstruations within two days of each other. However, another study by Trevathana et al. on 29 lesbian couples showed no evidence of menstrual synchrony.
Many of the criticisms about the studies done by McClintock centered on methodological errors and errors in data collection and mathematical calculations. H. Clyde Wilson of the University of Missouri even made studies with these errors corrected and his studies showed no evidence of menstrual synchrony.
Despite these many conflicting studies on human pheromones, the question of whether human pheromones actually do exist is still unanswered. Still, many human behaviors are such that they are affected by other humans. In other animals, different kinds of pheromones are released for different purposes such as for alarms, sexual attraction, information, and many more. While these chemicals have actually been observed to be excreted by other animals, human pheromones have not been identified and named.
You have probably heard of the terms cologne and perfume used interchangeably over the years. However, a cologne and a perfume, although they have their similarities, are different. A cologne is more diluted than perfume and hence, less expensive as well. Often labeled as “eau de toilette”, directly translated as toilet water, a cologne is not as long lasting as a perfume.
Since colognes still serve their purpose, which is to put scent, a lot of people prefer to use them instead of the more expensive perfumes. There are many different cologne in the market and the variety of scents is limitless. You can use a pheromone cologne to attract women because this is a type of cologne that contains pheromones.
With the wide selection of colognes to choose from, some people find it hard to pick one that is right for them. Below are some tips for choosing the best cologne for you.
- Avoid synthetic compounds. A lot of colognes include ingredients that may cause skin problems. If you have a history of eczema, rashes, dermatitis, and hives, avoid colognes that have synthetic compounds. Some ingredients to steer clear from acetone, benzyl alcohol, benzyl acetate, limonene, benzaldehyde, ethyl acetate, a-pinene, and linalool.
- Choose based on your skin type. You will be putting or spraying your cologne on your skin so it is very important to know what your skin type is to make sure that the cologne you will choose will be enhanced by the type of skin that you have. Those will oily skin will benefit most from colognes with a light citrus scent or light, airy, summertime scents. If you have dry skin, then scents do not last very long on your skin so it is good to try heavier or thicker scent.
- Try out the cologne on your skin. Do not just rely on colognes sprayed on paper when choosing the scent for you. Different colognes adhere differently to different people so it is better to spray the cologne on your skin to try it out. This will test not just the individual smell of the cologne but also the resulting scent once it has mixed with your sweat and the natural moisture on your body.
- Wait several hours before buying. When buying cologne, do not buy within the next few minutes after trying the cologne on your body. Colognes change scents over a span of several hours so it is best to wear the cologne first for four to six hours before buying it.
Whether there is a special occasion coming up or you simply want to surprise your significant other, buying a gift is something that you will do at least once. Among the usual options when buying a gift for a partner is perfume.
However, giving perfume to your partner can be quite tricky. For your partner to really appreciate it, the perfume has to appeal to his or her sense of smell. Below are some tips to help you when buying perfume for your partner.
- Go for his or her signature perfume. If your partner has a perfume that he or she is loyal to, it is safest to buy the same perfume for him or her. However, this will only work best if he or she has an almost empty bottle of perfume. Otherwise, your gift might sit for a long time in storage before it gets opened and used. So make sure to make a discreet check of how much more perfume your partner still has. You may also try asking your partner whether he or she is running out of perfume soon.
- Go for his or her personality. If you are planning on buying a new scent for your partner, make sure to go for a scent that suits his or her personality. Is your partner sporty? Do you think a floral smell or a citrus one will fit her better? Choose a perfume whose scent reminds you of your partner. You might also want to try giving a pheromone cologne which supposedly makes the wearer more attractive to the opposite sex with the inclusion of human pheromones in its ingredients.
- Go for a popular one. It might also be a safe option for you to choose among the most popular perfumes in the market. There are many branded perfumes such as those by Dolce & Gabbana, Calvin Klein, Dior, Ralph Lauren, Versace, and many more. However, these branded perfumes can be quite pricey. If you prefer something that is not very expensive but smells as good as a particular brand or scent, consider looking for imitation perfumes that are designed to smell like the real branded ones.
- Go for a seasonal one. Various perfumes appeal to different seasons. Some perfumes are better worn during the summer while there are some that are better during colder weather. Choose a perfume that is appropriate for the season or the weather in your location.
This is the conclusion of the series: Dating Guide 101. Previously, we talked about the DOs and DONTs while on a date. On this last installment, take note of the things to remember right after the date itself.
Last-minute reminders before ending the date.
- Be sure to express your personal and relationship goals. The other party must be aware if you’re really out looking for a relationship or if you’re just in for the friendship. This might be the turning point if there would be a “continuation to the saga”.
- Unless you’re tremendously attracted and you feel that he/she is as well, do not voice your plans about the next date. You might sound too eager that you’ll turn him/her off. Worse, you might scare him/her away, you’ll leave an impression of becoming a potential stalker.
- Do not request for their social media profiles. No to add me on Facebook, follow me on twitter. Save it if you’re in a relationship already.
- Contemplate on how to say goodbye. A walk to the doorway might look promising. A polite farewell might mean “Nice meeting you, I hope I don’t see you again.” A handshake might connote “Thanks for the evening. You certainly have the makings of a good buddy.” For the ladies, be honest with the guy if after the first date, there’s no spark on your end. Be gentle but firm with your words.
- Do not pressure him/her for a kiss or hug. If the feeling is mutual, it will all come naturally. Do not go too intimate right after the date even if your human pheromones suggest otherwise. If you do, you might send the wrong signal that you’re just a “fling” material, not someone up “for keeps.”
- On your way home, text something short and sweet. This is a great way to end a successful night.
- Immediately weigh up the positives and negatives of the event. Did you have something in common? Did you connect at some level?
- Assess if he/she is interested. Did he/she maintain eye contact? Was there a little flirting? Was there any incident when you do have felt as if his pheromones were at work? In the manner of how the two of you communicated, was there ease? Were you comfy that you didn’t notice the time passed you by? Was there chemistry?
- Do not be hasty in making your final assessment. If the date didn’t sound so good but he/she seems nice, give him another chance. It might just be a case of “being in a wrong place at a wrong time”.
The two-day rule.
- Allot at least two days before you get in touch again. A day later might mean you’re too desperate. A week might signify you have no intention to pursue her anymore.
- Learn the word “compromise”. For men, give her an option to say no BUT remember to convey that you are interested and willing to wait. For women, in case you are busy with your sched, recommend an alternative where you’ll be most available.
- How to contact her. You can either make a call or have a bunch of flowers delivered to her home to subtlety inform that you like her.
This three-part series is about Dating 101. It aims to share the DOs and DONTs before, during and after a date. On the first series, let’s tackle the five (5) basic items to remember before going to the date proper.
- Research, research!
- For men. Do a research on your lady before asking her out. What type of food does she like? What activities would interest her? From here, you can plan on where to treat her best.
- For women. Check the guy out first. Don’t be so hasty in turning down the invitation. You never know, he might be the one!
- Plan and visualize the date before it happens.
- For men. Once you have an idea of her likes and dislikes, start planning. Where will you treat her? Choose a romantic ambience where you both have a common ground. Do not be defined with the usual perception of “romance”. You can challenge her to a tennis match and still be romantic and sweet by inviting her favorite couple in the world. How long will the date be? Would it be a morning, noon, afternoon or evening rendezvous? How do you keep the conversation going? Connection is the most essential aspect above all these so remember to think of ways to connect.
- For women. Take it all in a stride. No high expectations. If he asks you to go to the movies with him, imagine beforehand the films where you’d get a glimpse of his character. Do not make abrupt judgment on the activity type he offers.
- Take a rest and be relaxed.
- For men. Have a break for an hour or two prior to the ‘event’. If you would be coming from work, stay where you can de-stress. Coming to the date well-rested will do wonders to your overall aura.
- For women. Indulge yourself to a quick trip to a beauty salon or spa. This will certainly relax all stressed muscles strained from the day’s work.
- Dress up!
- For men. First impressions last. Catch her attention by dressing up wisely. A very small dab of masculine cologne can activate human pheromones. Let the pheromones advantage weave its magic. Wear a watch to show your personality. Trim your nails and have a haircut as you deem necessary.
- For women. Select clothes that will highlight your greatest features. No too much skin though. Opt for comfortable yet stylish and flattering look. And of course, be sure to smell nice.
- Meeting arrangement.
- For men. Do you pick her up at her house? If so, make sure to bring her favorite flowers or anything that will set the mood right. Do you meet at the dating place? Be ahead at least by five (5) minutes to give a good impact.
- For women. If he’s coming to your place, be ready and prompt. Quickly scan your interiors to see if it projects who you are. If you’re going to meet elsewhere, time your arrival. Too early could mean you’re too excited. Too late could signify you’re not interested.
Tune in to the next post for the dating guide checklist while on a date.